Almost forgot.

I really wanted to talk tonight. But, come tomorrow morning, I'll be too tired, and stressed to worry about that anymore. Oh, well. I guess, it's better that way.

It kind of really bugs me

that people only have things to say about my blogs that bash people. If that's all you're going to comment on, get the fuck off my blog and don't comment at all. I didn't start this so people could get their jollies off on my rants.

GAAAAAH

You stupid, piece of shit, jizz licking fuckbag. You're the biggest oxymoron ever.

"Fight for fairness! But, if you don't agree with what I say, fuck you! You don't deserve to be here.
Don't forget, any fight, no matter how little or stupid, or useless it is is not for naught! We have to make sure everyone knows, there's more than two genders now! We can be man, woman, and yes, you guessed it: MANBEARPIGS. How fanfuckingtastic is that? I'm going to shit my pants! but, since I'm so not heteronormative, my poop is rainbow colored. Plus, I have no race. I'm just a species."

There's so much more that could fit there, but I'd rather not waste my time pretending to be you out of fear of becoming you.

Just so you know, shoving your beliefs down our throats won't make us agree. It makes us fight for the opposite. Isn't that what happened to you? IRONY

It's great how you started all this shit because of the way you were treated, and now you treat people the same way. It's like far left wing versus the far right wing. Both are retarded, they just have differing values.

The way you act is a shame to all of the movements you support. You make them look so bad, and I can't take any of your shit seriously because you're so gung ho about being a sore bitch because people don't want to hear you whine and complain about FUCKING PRONOUNS, or some other stupid shit like that. Do us all a favor and shut the fuck up. We want peace and quiet. For someone who's fighting for peace, you sure are disrupting what little peace we do have.

I seriously hope God, or whatever you may call him at this point, hits you with the biggest brick of irony. By the way, do you believe that Jesus has a gender, or was he gay? Bi? Anything in your Long Beach Ghetto Tower community?

Just so you know, being gay, or being called gay isn't an insult. So, stop preaching like it is. If you want it to be accepted, then act like it is. Don't preach like it isn't. At that point, you're just reinforcing the idea.

So, go to hell. I hope it's full of homophobes, and all kinds of bullshit for you to rage at. Then, you can lecture, rant, and rave all you like. But, until then, do us all a favor.

Eat a dick, and shut the fuck up.

I'm sweaty, out of breath, and I just want to lie down.

Too bad I've got a paper to write, lines to memorize, and another paper to start researching.

Anyway, I guess I'm kind of sad, but not super sad. Just a little bummed because of the last few days. It's okay though, nothing serious. I'm sure things will get better. It's just coincidence and bad timing. That's all, I guess.

On to what this is supposed to be about.

Gosh, I've missed running. I hate jogging, but running. Oh, man. That's where it's at. Out of breath after 400 meters, and having 1200 more to push through. I love trying to push how far I can go at a fast pace because when I slow down, I still have more to finish. It's like a challenge, but a little one that I can do over and over again. Each time, I get closer to not failing. It's my chance to make up for every race I lost, every set I died on, every time I skipped out on extra lifting and practice, and all the times I went to Carl's, Denny's, or In N' Out. I get to tell my fat stomach, "Fuck you," and take off like I never stopped running. Sure, it sucks being that tired, and out of shape, but what's the point of getting in shape, if you never get out of shape to begin with? I sprint at the end of each run, regardless of how tired I am. My form has gotten really shitty, but it's also changed for the better. Maybe, I can fix it, and be better than ever. Until then, I'm just going to keep running. Summer's coming up, and I'm not about to be fat and lazy this summer. I've got so much to do, and such little time. I need as much energy as possible. I guess, that's it for now. On to my paper and lines.

Oh, and Cal Poly, you better watch out. You might have a new sprinter next year.

All I can say is

This is your just desserts. Both of you.

Here it comes.

The second I read the first few sentences, I knew. And, I'm really truly extremely sorry for how I've been. I've just been so upset about the stupidest things, and I know I've never really given anything a chance. Maybe this was a mistake. Something that should have stayed casual, but didn't. I know in the end, I can probably only be alone because this is the one part about my life that I want to do my own way. Maybe I can learn to compromise. Or, maybe I can't. I just. I can't stand a lot of this anymore. I let go of everything- and I mean everything- I held important in my eyes. I destroyed the entire basis of what made me, well. Me. And, this. This is something I feel so strongly about, I'm going to be a dick about it until I'm satisfied. This is what I'm in control of. This is what I say it is. This is what I want it to be. This sounds how I make it sound. This is me. I put my entire soul, heart, life, and feeling into this. It's me without the body, flowing through others and showing them who I am, not in body, but in mind and spirit.

I'm sorry I'm such an asshole. And, I'm sorry I never gave anything a chance. But, I'd really suggest ending this now, just so we can still be friends.

Like I said before, I love you. You're one of my dearest friends, as well as one of the best. And, to this day, I can't think of a thing you weren't there for me for. For that, I will always be grateful. And, you know, I'll be here for you. For anything you want or need. I'll play anything for and with you, without saying a word, if that's what you want. I'll do it all. But, if you want to know what I think, I'm going to be honest. If you want my opinion, I'll be honest. But, I am wrong for shutting you down without a chance. So, for that, I'm forever sorry.

Please, don't hate me. You're one of the few friends I still have.