Monday, April 19, 2010

Gravity

I'm sitting here, listening to John Mayer, and that alone is probably what's keeping me here. I'm not going to lie, my life is really fucking hard right now, and the hugest part of me just wants to curl up into a little ball and die. Yeah, I've got a lot to be thankful for, but it does me no good when I hate myself. Please, don't ask why, I just do. I keep playing "Gravity" over and over, and it seems that every time it ends, it comes too soon. Anyway, I just don't know what to do right now. I feel cheap, used, stupid, immoral, and most of all, just plain old sad. I gave up my morals for a stupid decision that didn't even help me. Cheap thrills are the stupidest things. They're also the darnedest. I hate them, and how I can't seem to stay away from them.

So, my depression, my sadness, my problems, are all my fault. Just my own. My unhappiness is my own doing. Right now, forget my dreams, ambitions, goals, aspirations, and anything else that motivates me.

Oh, gravity. Stay the hell away from me.

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